Why I Do What I Do: The Email That Reminded Me Why This Matters
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Dear Readers
Often I have moments when I stop and wonder whether what I’m doing really matters. Is it actually making any difference in the world?
Leaving medicine was one of the hardest decisions I ever made.
I walked away from a career that I had spent decades building. My whole childhood was geared towards getting into medical school and becoming a doctor. I didn’t leave because I had stopped caring about people. Quite the contrary. I left because I felt increasingly unable to speak honestly about what I was seeing and thinking.
After being cancelled by two hospitals, the choice became stark.
I could slowly rebuild my career, stop the podcast, slip quietly back into mainstream medicine, keep my head down, and stay within the accepted boundaries.
Or I could continue speaking up about the injustices I saw in the world, of which there are many, and sacrifice my career in the process.
I chose the latter.
Since then, I’ve been called many things. I’ve been criticised, ridiculed, and had my motives questioned, not just by those I perceived to be the enemy, but even by people who were supposedly on the same side as me.
I’ve lost colleagues, friends, opportunities, and the comfort that comes with staying inside the accepted boundaries of polite opinion and mainstream medicine.
But I’ve also discovered something I never expected.
I discovered a beautiful community of people who simply want to think for themselves.
I’ve made friends from all parts of the world. Some I’ve never met and some I have. They are the kind of friendships I can only describe as real, friendships with depth, honesty, and connection.
And what about the community that has gathered around the podcast?
These are people who aren’t looking for someone to tell them what to believe. They are looking for someone willing to ask difficult questions. People who understand that curiosity is not dangerous, that changing your mind is not weakness, and that genuine conversation is becoming one of the rarest commodities in modern life.
A few days ago, I received an email that stopped me in my tracks and made me deeply reflect on who I am and why I do this.
Dear Dr Malik,
I just wanted to write and thank you for the incredible work you do. Your show is absolutely brilliant, and I think I’ve listened to almost every episode.
I was genuinely touched when you gifted me a year’s subscription. It was such a kind and generous gesture, and I really appreciated it.
Ironically, I had already been subscribing through Spotify, but for some reason they stopped taking my payments, which was rather strange! I’ve now gone ahead and paid for another year’s subscription because your work is something I truly value and want to support.
I can’t overstate how much the show has helped me over the years. You genuinely help keep me sane in what can often be a very chaotic world. Thanks to your thoughtful discussions and willingness to challenge conventional thinking, I’ve changed my opinions on many things and learned to look at issues from different perspectives.
Thank you for helping me keep my eyes open, for encouraging curiosity, and for consistently producing such insightful content.
Your work makes a real difference.
With sincere thanks and best wishes always!
Cheryl
I read messages like this with a mixture of gratitude and humility because, if I’m honest, I don’t think of myself as someone who has all the answers.
I don’t do the podcast because I think I’m right about everything.
Quite the opposite.
I started the podcast because I had so many questions, so many unanswered questions, and I didn’t know who to trust.
So I thought, ok, I would simply go out and speak to as many people as I could, many of whom had been cancelled or silenced, and perhaps through those conversations I might get a little closer to the truth, or at least a better understanding of reality.
And I wanted to share that journey of discovery with you.
I do the podcast because I think we’ve lost the art of asking questions, tough questions, the ones that make people uncomfortable.
I do it because medicine taught me that certainty can be dangerous, and life has taught me that wisdom often comes from listening to people whose experiences don’t fit the official narrative.
I do it because I believe ordinary people deserve informed consent, honest discussion, and the freedom to explore ideas without fear.
I do it because I passionately believe in medical ethics, and I am aghast at how those principles have been trampled over during the last few years.
Most of all, I do it because I know what it feels like to think you’re going mad while the world insists that obvious contradictions and inversions do not exist.
If the podcast helps even one person feel a little less alone, a little more curious, or a little more confident in trusting their own judgement, then every difficult moment has been worth it.
I often say during my consultations that my job now is not to diagnose or treat people.
It’s to listen. To encourage. To challenge. To help people ask better questions. To empower them.
And perhaps, in a world that often feels chaotic and manipulated, to remind each other that keeping our eyes open is still one of the most important things we can do.
To everyone who listens, reads, supports the show, subscribes, shares an episode with a friend, or simply sends a message like the one above, thank you.
I believe I am being shadow banned. I believe my reach is being throttled across multiple platforms, including Substack. The metrics appear undeniable to me. It often feels as though the authorities and powerful institutions do not want my message, or the messages of many of my guests, to be widely heard.
But you are the reason I keep going.
And on the days when I have doubts, and I do, because I have my own weaknesses and I am far from infallible, messages like this remind me why I’m doing what I’m doing.
It means more to me than you could ever imagine.
Lots of love,
Doc Malik
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Come and spend time with like-minded souls, breathe deeply, laugh loudly, and create lifelong memories in a beautiful, peaceful setting.
This is your opportunity to reset, reconnect, and realign, and I’d love for you to be part of it.
Let’s make it a weekend to remember. 💫
If you’re feeling:
Stuck in old patterns
Drained, tired, craving a deeper spark
Like something essential is missing from your life
Tired of tip-toeing around people who don’t get you?
Longing for real, deep, meaningful conversations?
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Ready to finally meet your tribe and feel whole again?
Then this weekend is for you.
Imagine three awesome days:
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What past retreat attendees said:
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This isn’t just another “wellness weekend.”
It’s a chance to break free.
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You already know more than you think.
Sometimes you just need the right conversation.
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I offer something rare: time, clarity, and straight talking guidance.
As your independent health advocate, I help you understand what is really going on and make confident decisions.
We cut through the noise, decode the jargon, and map out your next steps, whether that is doctors, treatments, surgery, or lifestyle.
WHY IT MATTERS
Too many leave appointments with more questions than answers.
I help you see the bigger picture, ask better questions, and take back control.
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A QUICK NOTE
I am no longer GMC registered.
This is educational and advisory support, not medical diagnosis or treatment.
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Because it is your body, your life, your future.
Love,
Doc Malik
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Disclaimer
I Ahmad Malik: am a private civilian, protected by the Geneva Convention.
My substack, social media posts and podcasts are my personal experiences, observations and opinions. This information is for educational purposes only. Although I am a doctor, I am not your doctor, and I am not providing medical or legal advice to you or to the wider public. I am not licensed or registered with the GMC or any other licensing board.
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I subscribed after your interview with Delingpole. It was clear from that you are not wanting to get along to get along, that you are on a journey of honest enquiry, and that you are carrying a degree of angst at what has been done to us (as would any normal person) but unlike more high profile resistance individuals who seem to be enjoying themselves far too much with the way things are.. It's been six years now since a lot of us realised the real deal, and it is gently terrifying that we are still by and large in the same vulnerable position. But we will eventually coalesce and start to figure out how to resist these bastards and I think your podcast will be a contributor to that process.
It took 12 years of part-time study, while working full time and home educating my son, for me to qualify as a Barefoot Doctor of traditional Chinese medicine. That was in 1997.
I was very successfully running two clinics; one charitable drop-in for addicts in Colchester and one general practice from home. I did not have many days off.
Just 6 years later, in 2003 the British government made the import of dried Chinese herbs illegal and local freemasons' wives attempted to murder me with a poisoned cake. It took a year for me to recover and I lost everything I had built.
NHS took over the clinic for addiction, my boyfriend moved out taking our dog and most of the valuables from our home. My friends and clients dwindled as did my weight and self esteem.
In January of 2004 I sold up, fitted out a hi-top van and went travelling with two dogs and a cat. I bought an off-grid fruit farm in central Spain where I restored myself and founded a small village evening school teaching English.
In 2008 the international financial crash wrecked the Spanish economy and I was obliged to sell up and return to UK or go bankrupt.
It seemed that no matter what I did, external forces were lurking and waiting to trash my plans.
I gave up making plans at that point!
Since then I have devoted my time to activism and writing which, as you are acutely aware, is unpaid and has certain risks attached. However, when everything we worked for is completely stripped away, there is something to be said for the unfettered freedom we are left with.
I look back on it all with gratitude now as I wind down in retirement.
You made the right choice, Doc. You expanded your influence and your knowledge. You grew and will continue to do so.....
Who knows what lies ahead for you? In such a volatile world, everything is subject to change and you have already proved to relish a challenge or six. May you continue to crest the waves of fortune with a cheeky grin and an open loving heart.
We are all very much the richer for learning alongside you as you share your conversations and accumulated wisdom.